torn apart
I’m not even ranting at this point but my heart is pretty much torn in half right about now. idk how to explain this feeling but i will try. Things with us weren’t great, shit we started off not knowing where we were gonna go but as of right now i really do question. idk how i see us in the future. i know you’re not suppose to know what will happen but lately i’ve been questioning whether a future for us even exists… i love you, more than i can really realize but how am i to be with someone when their family member hates me. its not even a distanced cousin or something which is the worst part. its sad that i know we can never get along. i guess what chi mai said was right. it was kinda messed up but i think its a perfectly plausible reason why she hates me… i’m torn apart to whether id leave or stay. no one is suppose to interfere blah blah i know that, and i’m not gonna sit here and make you choose. but what if you had to one day?i know you can’t deny her but how can you deny me either? and if and when that day comes i’m sure i know what decision you’d make. the question here is, do i stay or do i go? i don’t know how else to put this… it just hurts knowing that there’s nothing you’re willing to try to stop it… i gotta do everything by myself well shit, i tried and if you won’t help me it’s never gonna work out… no matter how much i want it too.
